Online Bullying - Help Your Teens

Help Your Teen Prevent Cyberbullying

krischislett — Sat, 03 Jun 2023 17:59:42 +0000

How to prevent my teen from online hate and cyberbullying?

We’re living in an age where incivility and trolling is not only common, it’s become the new normal.

PEW Research Center recent survey found that 63 percent of teens said that online harassment and bullying was a major problem, while 59 percent reported experiencing being bullied or harassed online.

It’s a sea of sadness when we read headlines of peer cruelty and youth dying as the word bullycide has now entered our vocabulary.

Digital discourse

Generations earlier, before technology and social playgrounds such as Instagram and Snapchat, kids were teasing and mocking each other in schools, neighborhoods or on their traditional playground with monkey bars and swings.

What hasn’t changed is name-calling.

Being called offensive names is the most offensive form of cyberbullying according to teens in this survey at 42 percent, followed by someone spreading false rumors about them on the internet at 32 percent.

The difference between twenty years ago and today is that with technology, your insults are magnified by a million.

Resilience can be learned

Resilience is a word we’re all familiar with; however, with the rise of online hate and harassment, it’s imperative to discuss how to build digital resilience with our teens.

In the PEW Research survey, teens share that parents are, overall, doing a good job in helping them handle cyberbullying—however, they felt that teachers, social media platforms and others could be more involved.

Digital resilience is a tool that helps people of all ages move through the difficulties of trolling and cyber-combat.

1. Prepare them (and yourself) for the ugly side of the Internet or possibly being upset by what people say. Remind them there could be inappropriate content that slips through filters. Being forewarned is being forearmed.

2. Show them how to block individuals, flag and report abusive content, and when to report incidents. Emphasize the importance of telling someone “in real life.”

3. Show your teen how easily digital pictures can be manipulated. The realization that not everything is what it seems is a useful first step—understanding that life is not as perfect as it may seem virtually. Teens may be familiar with the digital world but less familiar with the motivations for creating ‘fake’ images.

4. Critical thinking. Help them to think through the possible consequences of what they post online. Remind them that there is no rewind: once it’s posted, it’s nearly impossible to take back. Fifteen minutes of humor is not worth a lifetime of humiliation.

5. Encourage your teen to socialize in person with their friends. Communicating solely behind a screen can be isolating. Socializing in person builds more face-to-face contact in helping your child have empathy and compassion towards people.

Getting schools involved

After a cyberbullying episode hit her daughter’s public charter school, parent and video producer Diana Graber developed this program based on the master’s degree she had just received in media psychology and social change. Graber still teaches the course herself, but also trains teachers to run the program at their own schools, providing video and written materials for a fee.

Since its inception, the program has grown to be offered in more than one hundred schools in 47 states and overseas, ranging from Waldorf to public schools.

Sixth graders begin with the basic concepts of digital citizenship, covering digital footprints, what should never be shared online, and antibullying behavior, such as the difference between being an upstander and a bystander. Seventh graders focus on research skills, covering concepts such as keywords, Wikipedia, fair use, browsers, search engines, and privacy protection.

By eighth grade, the students shift focus again to consuming versus producing online content, covering media literacy issues from sexting to Photoshopping to copyright protection. The final exam is a series of questions we adults would likely fail: What are cookies and how do they work? What does URL stand for? What is a spider? What are the eight tips for a secure password?

While much of the same information is on her complementary website, CyberWise.org, Graber ultimately found that approaching the students directly, instead of using their parents as mediators, works best. “Kids don’t want to talk to their parents in middle school,” she says. “The talking is with each other. If we can make safe spaces in the classroom, that is way more powerful.”

Graber knew her message was received when a new girl posted a photo of herself in a bikini, and an eighth-grade boy who’d taken the course scolded her. “You need to take that off your Instagram,” he told her bluntly. “That was stupid.” Harsh, Graber concedes—but effective. “In a crude way, he was looking out for her. The kids start being each other’s mentors.”

This teacher seems to be making a difference with her curriculum, CyberCivics, that is now spreading throughout the country. Originally posted on Psychology Today by Sue Scheff.

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If you are struggling with your teenager’s behavior and you have exhausted your local resources, learn more about how residential treatment can help your troubled teen through emotional growth. Contact us today for a free consultation.

The post Help Your Teen Prevent Cyberbullying first appeared on Help Your Teens.

Effects of Cyberbullying on Teens

krischislett — Tue, 02 May 2023 17:52:41 +0000

What are the effects of cyberbullying on teenage mental health? Research shares that nearly half of teens (46 percent) say they are now online constantly — which means they are more at risk for cyber-victimization.

Unlike bullying in person which can be contained to classrooms, buses or neighborhoods, cyberbullying is on a global platform that can spread worldwide. It can be in the form of a text message spread to millions of peers (and strangers), or on a social media post gone viral. We have seen the results of sexting scandals that have crisscrossed our country in both middle schools and high schools — leaving adolescents emotionally devastated.

Has your teen sent or received a sext message or posted something inappropriately, only to become a target of online shame? Never doubt the cruelty of some people online — with the anonymity of social media, peers can take on a new persona without a second thought that there is a real person behind the screen.

Have you noticed your teen:

-Becoming withdrawn, avoiding friends or social events
-Feelings of sadness
-Hiding their screen (phone or computer) from your view
-Grades are dropping, skipping classes, school refusal
-Seems anxious or angry when on their device
–Isolating themselves in their room (more than normal)
-Believe they are doing drugs or drinking (maybe self-medicating)

These are some indications that your teen might be a victim of cyberbullying. Being aware of the effects of cyberbullying can help you support your child.

4 Mental Health Effects of Cyberbullying on Teenagers

1. Depression and anxiety.

Many teens are seeking gratification and approval through their social media platforms, basing their self-worth on how many “likes” or followers they garnish through their posts. Teenagers who search for acceptance on social media are more likely to succumb to those that are not always going to agree with them. Another words, they are at a higher risk of cyberbullying and online hate.

There is a vast amount of research which concurs that teens that are victims of online bullying and harassment has consistently led to higher levels of depression and anxiety. In addition, one study found that 93% of the teens that were victimized felt sadness, hopelessness, powerlessness and loneliness.

Since 2019 the numbers have doubled of youth struggling with depression and anxiety, and many experts have blamed the increase of screen-time for this statistic — cyberbullying has also increased 40 percent since 2020.

2. Digital self-harm

Digital self-harm is a trend that parents might not be aware of. Studies show distressed teens physically injure themselves via cutting, burning or other forms of self-harm as a way to cope with their pain.

Teens are anonymously posting mean and derogatory comments about themselves on social media as a way to manage feelings of sadness and self-hatred and to gain attention from their friends.

According to the American Psychological Association, teens who physically injure themselves often struggle with depression, post-traumatic stress disorder or difficulties with emotional regulation.

3. Self-harm and suicide ideation

Again, there has been numerous reports proving victims of cyberbullying are at a greater risk of both self-harm and suicidal behaviors. Teens that are being constantly harassed by peers (or strangers) through digital means (social media, text messages, instant messaging) often begin to feel helpless and hopeless.

If your teen is a victim of revenge porn or a sext message gone viral, the embarrassment and humiliation can be overwhelming. Maybe it’s a malicious prank someone posted about them — the online shame your teen feels can be emotional traumatic.

That’s when a teen may believe only way to relieve the pain is to end their life — or some will self-harm such as cutting or burning themselves.

4. Eating disorders.

Social media is where teens are posting images faster than lightening. The numbers are overwhelming and although much of the content supports positive body image, some promote the opposite — body shaming. A teen will literally spend hours perfecting an image to post online, and within minutes haters can pile on distasteful comments, ugly memes, and spread harmful rumors.

The relation of body image to bullying is strong. In one study, 90 percent indicated that they are currently bullied and 75 percent reported struggling with a clinically significant eating disorder.

Never doubt, the digital playgrounds your teens are on can be a harsh environment. The old cliché of sticks and stones will break your bones, but words will never hurt you, is history. YES, words hurt and the pain can be long-lasting if not addressed with professional help.

Also read:

How to Help My Teen Handle Cyberbullying.

What Causes Teen Mental Health Issues.

How to Limit Screen-Time.

The Impact of Bullying on Teens.

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If your teen is struggling with any of the above issues and local resources haven’t been able to help, contact us to learn more about how residential treatment can benefit your teen and family.

The post Effects of Cyberbullying on Teens first appeared on Help Your Teens.

5 Ways to Combat Cyberbullying for Teens

krischislett — Wed, 28 Mar 2018 16:18:30 +0000

In 2017 we heard a lot about digital resilience, but do we understand what it is?

Helping our teens be ready for online hate and digital discourse offline can better prepare them when they are faced with it. Reality is that incivility exists – sadly this is a human behavior that we don’t have control over, but we can choose how we handle it.

Today our kids consider their digital life as important as their lives offline, so it’s important to give them as much knowledge and encouragement to know they are not alone when they are faced with cyber-hate.

Cyberbullying is not only impacting our teen’s emotionally – it causes them to miss school, become withdrawn, drop out of sports or other activities they once enjoyed, failing when they were once good students, changing peer groups or becoming isolated and more. Teens can experience a higher level of stress and anxiety when they are struggling with online bullying.

The most troubling outcome of cyberbullying and online harassment is the rise in bullycide. Too many young lives have already been taken — parents need to educate themselves to better protect their kids offline to handle online issues.

5 ways to build digital resilience

Prepare them for the ugly side of the Internet or possibly being upset by what people say. Remind them it could be inappropriate content that slips through filters. Being forewarned is being forearmed.
Show them how to block individuals, flag and report abusive content, and when to report incidents. Emphasize the importance of telling someone “in real life.”
Show your teen how easily digital pictures can be manipulated. The realization that not everything is what it seems is a useful first step – understanding that life is not as perfect as it may seem virtually. Teens may be familiar with the digital world but less familiar with the motivations for creating ‘fake’ images.
Help them to think through the possible consequences of what they post online. Remind them that there is no rewind, once it’s posted it’s nearly impossible to take back. Fifteen minutes of humor is not worth a lifetime of humiliation.
Encourage your teen to socialize in person with their friends. Communicating solely behind a screen can be isolating. Socializing in person builds more face-to-face contact in helping your child have empathy and compassion towards people.

As we know communication is key with your teenager, yet can also be challenging. Have you considered book chats? My latest book, Shame Nation: Choosing Kindness and Compassion in an Age of Cruelty and Trolling (Sourcebooks, October 2017) was written for both teens and parents and perfect for discussions on digital wisdom, cyberbullying and making good cyber-decisions.

Order on Shame Nation – on Amazon.

Together we can start curbing this culture of cruelty and bring it to a civil nation.

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The post 5 Ways to Combat Cyberbullying for Teens first appeared on Help Your Teens.